The cast
Here are their identities:
1: Rabid Chocobo
Boss at the comic book HQ. Violent and occasionally sadistic. Oh, and female.
2: Solid Jim
Main penciller. Ruthlessly devious, although often paranoid. Displays few outward emotions, though finds joy in the suffering of others.
3: Nevermore
A hanger-on. Messes with others' minds. Alcohol. Has a way with words. They are his weapon.
4: Yud
Script writer. Resents Jim. A James Bond fanatic. Inventor of strange and bizarre things.
5: Edge
A vaguely dissatisfied inker. Pleasant enough chap.
6: Eskimo
Star wars fanatic. Lives in his own world. Speaking to him is somewhat like being transported to a parallel universe, or Belgium.
7: Rufus Shinra
President of a sinister mega-global corporation. Spends some time at the comic book HQ to help his poll ratings.
8: Tifa Lockheart
Has an inexplicable interest in Jim. Does some other stuff, probably.
9: Reno
Likes Chocobo. Fears Jim. Pathetic hormone-driven alcoholic who deserves to be put through physical, mental and psychological pain.
10: Squallid Snake
Eskimo's apprentice, and the world's worst secret agent.
11: Mechninja
An antagonist. Also known as Sephiroth to those in the know.
12: Black Arts Viper
Part-time secret agent and child of the Eighties.
13: Solid Snake
The second greatest secret agent in the world.
14: Loony
Likes Chocobo. Fears Jim. Neither feelings are what could be called mutual.
15: Mongoose
Very quiet unless angered. Makes the Incredible Hulk look like a large green man with a ridiculous name.
16: Scarlet
The scourge of the male population.
17: Flaming Sox Monthorp
A hick. Unimportant.
18: Paddy
The rookie of the antagonists. Strangely resistant to death. Keeps coming back like a bad penny, whatever one of those is.
19: MGDave
The sinister mastermind behind all that is evil in the world. Has designs on Sniper Wolf.
20: Sniper Wolf
The grestest sniper the world will ever know. Doesn't particularly seem to like MGDave, although more than tolerant of Mechninja.